Read the 1st chapter of Where There’s a Will by Beth Corby

Read the 1st chapter of Where There’s a Will by Beth Corby

where there's a will promo

Read the never before seen 1st chapter of Where There’s a Will by Beth Corby – THE fun, uplifting, romantic read for summer 2019!

Would you take the chance that could change everything?

After leaving university at the age of twenty-five with no idea what to do with her life, Hannah is stunned when she is left a mystery bequest by her rich, estranged great-uncle Donald.

But there’s a catch: before she can find out what she’s inherited, she must undertake a series of unknown tasks alongside Alec, Donald’s reluctant (but rather gorgeous) PA.

As the tasks progress and she and Alec grow closer, Hannah begins to think that Donald’s real gift might have more to do with love than money . . .

This funny, romantic and uplifting novel is perfect for fans of Sophie Kinsella, Cathy Hopkins and Anna Bell.

Read the 1st chapter by clicking on this link here.

Where There’s a Will is out in eBook on 30 May 2019. Pre-order it now.

Our top Valentine’s Day and Galentine’s Day reading picks

Our top Valentine’s Day and Galentine’s Day reading picks

Whether it’s Galentine’s Day or Valentine’s Day you plan on celebrating this week, Bookends has you covered with this FAB selection of books. From celebrating the power of female friendships to classic tales of ‘meet-cutes’, leave it to us to find you your next romantic read…

The Sisterhood – Daisy Buchanan

For fans of Bryony Gordon and Dolly Alderton, The Sisterhood is an honest and hilarious book which celebrates the ways in which women connect with each other.

‘My five sisters are the only women I would ever kill for. And they are the only women I have ever wanted to kill.’

Imagine living between the pages of Pride And Prejudice, in the Bennett household. Now, imagine how the Bennett girls as they’d be in the 21st century – looking like the Kardashian sisters, but behaving like the Simpsons. This is the house Daisy Buchanan grew up in,

Daisy’s memoir The Sisterhood explores what it’s like to live as a modern woman by examining some examples close to home – her adored and infuriating sisters. There’s Beth, the rebellious contrarian; Grace, the overachiever with a dark sense of humour; Livvy, the tough girl who secretly cries during adverts; Maddy, essentially Descartes with a beehive; and Dotty, the joker obsessed with RuPaul’s Drag Race and bears.

In this tender, funny and unflinchingly honest account Daisy examines her relationship with her sisters and what it’s made up of – friendship, insecurity jokes, jealousy and above all, love – while celebrating the ways in which women connect with each other and finding the ways in which we’re all sisters under the skin.

Maybe This Time – Jill Mansell

Maybe This Time

Heartwarming and joyful – the brand new romantic comedy from the Sunday Times bestselling author of THIS COULD CHANGE EVERYTHING. An irresistible read for fans of Lucy Diamond and Katie Fforde.

‘Mansell has delivered another winner with this compelling, thoughtful, emotionally intelligent book about love, friendship and not giving up’ Daily Mail

Mimi isn’t looking for love when she spends a weekend in Goosebrook, the Cotswolds village her dad has moved to. And her first encounter with Cal, who lives there too, is nothing like a scene in a romantic movie – although she can’t help noticing how charismatic he is. But Cal’s in no position to be any more than a friend, and Mimi heads back to her busy London life.

When they meet again four years later, it’s still not to be. Cal is focusing on his family, and Mimi on her career. Then Cal dives into a potentially perfect new romance whilst Mimi’s busy fixing other people’s relationships.

It seems as if something, or someone else, always gets in their way. Will it ever be the right time for both of them?

The F Word – Lily Pebbles

If there’s one piece of invaluable advice for women and girls of all ages, it is that there is nothing more important than creating and maintaining strong, positive and happy friendships with other women.

In a culture that largely pits women against each other, I want to celebrate female friendships… all strings attached!

If my 1998 diary is anything to go by, female friendships are incredibly complex and emotional but they’re the mini love stories that make us who we are. For many women, friends are our partners in crime through life; they are the ones who move us into new homes, out of bad relationships, through births and illnesses. In The F Word I’ve set out to explore and celebrate the essence of female friendship at different life stages and in its many wild and wonderful forms.

The Single Ladies of Jacaranda Retirement Village by Joanna Nell

The Single Ladies of Jacaranda Retirement Village by Joanna Nell

The life of 79-year-old pensioner Peggy Smart is as beige as the décor in her retirement village. Her week revolves around aqua aerobics and appointments with her doctor. The highlight of Peggy’s day is watching her neighbour Brian head out for his morning swim.

Peggy dreams of inviting the handsome widower – treasurer of the Residents’ Committee and one of the few eligible men in the village – to an intimate dinner. But why would an educated man like Brian, a chartered accountant no less, look twice at Peggy? As a woman of a certain age, she fears she has become invisible, even to men in their eighties.

But a chance encounter with an old school friend she hasn’t seen in five decades – the glamorous fashionista Angie Valentine – sets Peggy on an unexpected journey of self-discovery.

Can she channel her ‘inner Helen Mirren’ and find love and friendship in her twilight years?

The Night Tiger by Yangsze Choo

A captivating and magical story set in 1930s Malaysia about a dancehall girl and an orphan boy who are brought together by a series of mysterious events.

In 1930s colonial Malaya, a dissolute British doctor receives a surprise gift of an eleven-year-old Chinese houseboy. Sent as a bequest from an old friend, young Ren has a mission: to find his dead master’s severed finger and reunite it with his body. Ren has forty-nine days, or else his master’s soul will roam the earth forever.

Ji Lin, an apprentice dressmaker, moonlights as a dancehall girl to pay her mother’s debts. One night, Ji Lin’s dance partner leaves her with a gruesome souvenir that leads her on a crooked, dark trail.

As time runs out for Ren’s mission, a series of unexplained deaths occur amid rumours of tigers who turn into men. In their journey to keep a promise and discover the truth, Ren and Ji Lin’s paths will cross in ways they will never forget.

Sweeping and lushly written, The Night Tiger explores the rich world of servants and masters, ancient superstition and modern ambition, sibling rivalry and unexpected love. Woven through with Chinese folklore and a tantalizing mystery, this novel is a page-turner of the highest order.

The Prodigal Daughter by Prue Leith

Emotional family saga following the second generation of the Angelotti food dynasty, from household name Prue Leith. Perfect for fans of Penny Vincenzi and Barbara Taylor Bradford.

A new generation. It is 1968. Angelica Angelotti has grown up in her parents’ Italian restaurant. Now she is striking out on her own in Paris. There she falls in love with her charismatic but unpredictable cousin Mario.

A fresh challenge. Navigating a blossoming career, from the Savoy hotel to the world of television, alongside an increasingly toxic relationship proves impossible. The offer to run the pub on her family’s estate as a restaurant seems like the perfect escape. Chorlton has called her home…A brighter future. Soon she has a thriving business, and even the chance of a new love. But when Mario reappears, determined to win her back, will Angelica be able to hold on to everything she’s sacrificed so much for?

Your recipe for a Valentine’s Day feast!

Your recipe for a Valentine’s Day feast!

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and here at Bookends HQ we’ve been busy playing Cupid…

Whether you’re planning to celebrate with a romantic date night with that special someone, or a Galentine’s evening in with your best friends, we’ve pulled together all the ingredients you need for a Valentine’s Day feast!

For a wonderfully light starter, why not try Saliha Mahmood Ahmed’s Qubooli Rice Salad from her gorgeously vibrant cookbook Khazana. This dish is fresh, punchy, and packed full of Indo-Persian flavours!

Next up, we love Gino D’Acampo’s Farfalle with Clams, Mussels and Purple-Sprouting Broccoli from his latest cookbook, Gino’s Italian Adriatic Escape. The perfect dish to impress that special someone, or equally lovely as a tasty dinner for friends.

And if you’re after a vegetarian alternative that’s still packed full of flavours and Adriatic charm, Gino’s Aubergine and Caciocavallo Cheese Bake is a wonderfully simple dish that’s nonetheless sure to impress.

It wouldn’t be a Valentine’s Day menu without a serious serving of chocolately goodness, and The Brownie from Great British Bake Off contestant Liam CharlesLiam Charles Cheeky Treats delivers in a big way. The ultimate snack for a Valentine’s girls’ night in, or a sumptuous dessert to top off your romantic dinner, these brownies are sure to be a winner!

Paris vs Udaipur: the world's most romantic locations

Paris vs Udaipur: the world's most romantic locations

Author Alexandra Potter picks her top romantic locations.

Richmond Park, London

Nothing is more romantic than wrapping up warm and walking hand-in-hand with the one you love through the largest of London’s Royal’s parks, home to hundreds of red and fallow deer. This is a truly special place, filled with lakes, woodland and wildlife – and if you’re lucky, you’ll be rewarded with the sighting of one of the park’s majestic stags.

Bike path, Venice, California

‘On yer bike’ might not be your first choice, when you think about how you’d want to spend Valentine’s Day, but trust me, cycling alongside the pacific ocean, with the sun shining, sound of waves crashing and palm trees gently waving in the breeze, is hard to beat. And the best part? It’s totally flat. Which means the only thing that’s going to take your breath away, is when your boyfriend pops the question… (Well a girl can hope!)

A rooftop in Udaipur.

Picture yourself and that special someone, high up on a rooftop in Rajasthan, watching as the sun slowly sets over the lake. Breathe in the heady scent of perfumed oils and exotic spices. Listen to the sounds of children playing in the street below, mixed with the distant sounds of a sitar being played. But high on this rooftop in the middle of India it’s just the two of you, a million miles from everywhere. Magical.

A pub in the Lake District.

Baby it’s cold outside. So cosy up together in front of a roaring log fire in a traditional pub in the Lake District.  Throw in a bottle of wine, some hearty home-cooked food and weary limbs from a day spent hiking in the magnificent countryside and you won’t want to be anywhere else in the whole world.  And neither will any of your friends when they see your envy-inducing instagram photos!

Bookshop in Paris.

It’s hard to choose one spot in a city that’s been dubbed, ‘the most romantic city in the world’. There are the classic spots of course, such as the top of La Tour Eiffel, a boat cruise along the Seine, or one of the many pavement cafes. But nothing can compare to Shakespeare & Company. Literature and lovers have always gone together, so follow in the footsteps of Hemingway, Steinbeck and James Joyce and step into this enchanting bookstore, with it’s labyrinth of floor-to-ceiling book shelves and cosy nooks. Perfect for snuggling up and quoting poetry to each other.

 

The Love DetectiveDon't You Forget About Me

Two of Alexandra’s titles are part of our Romantic reads promotion and are currently only 99p in ebook. For the full list check out our blog post

Romantic Reads from Team Bookends

Romantic Reads from Team Bookends

We’re in the mood for romance! And just in time, too – we’ve selected some delicious ebook reads guaranteed to gear you up for Valentine’s Day. Added bonus: they’re all 99p!

Getting Over Mr Right

Getting Over Mr Right by Chrissie Manby

Have you ever had your heart broken? How did you get over it? Did a tub of ice cream cheer you up? Did you delete his number and start again? Are you now friends with your ex? Perhaps you’re godmother to his children?

In which case, you’re a weirdo and this book is not for you.

But if you reacted with denial, begging or a spot of casual witchcraft, then you’ve come to the right place. This is one woman’s journey from love to lunacy and back again . . .

Buy now

Perfect Wives

Perfect Wives by Emma Hannigan

Perfect for fans of Maeve Binchy, a heartwarming novel of love, friendship and coming home from the Irish bestseller…

When actress Jodi Ludlum returns to the Dublin village of Bakers Valley to raise her young son, she’s determined to shield him from the media glare that follows her in LA. But coming home means leaving her husband behind – and waking old ghosts… Francine Hennessy was born and raised in Bakers Valley. To all appearances, she is the model wife, mother, home-maker and career woman. But, behind closed doors, Francine’s life is crumbling around her. As Jodi struggles to conceal her secrets and Francine faces some shocking news, the two become unlikely confidants. Suddenly having the perfect life seems less important than finding friendship, and the perfect place to belong…’

Buy now

The Love Detective

The Love Detective by Alexandra Potter

Because love is the greatest mystery of all . . . Get ready for the adventure of a lifetime with this magical romantic comedy from the bestselling author of Me and Mr Darcy.

Buy now

Bay of Secrets

Bay of Secrets by Rosanna Ley

Set between England and the Spanish Canary Islands, three women learn the truth about their shared past, and discover the importance of family.

Buy now

Monday to Friday Man

Monday to Friday Man by Alice Peterson

A funny and heart-warming novel about love and loneliness, family and loyalty, lodgers and friendships – it’ll put a big smile on your face.

Buy now

The List

The List by Joanna Bolouri

The List: ten things you’ve always wanted to do in bed but never had the chance (or the courage!) to try. A bucket list for between the sheets. One year of pleasure, no strings attached.

Buy now

Now That I've Found You

Now That I’ve Found You by Ciara Geraghty

Everyone deserves to find that one person who’s meant for them, don’t they? Honest and wise, poignant and warm, this is completely absorbing storytelling for fans of Jojo Moyes and Marian Keyes.

Buy now

Katherine

Katherine by Anya Seton

‘A great adventure, powerfully told’ (Philippa Gregory)

A sumptuous tale of passion and danger in the medieval court, Anya Seton’s Katherine is an all-time classic.

Buy now

A Proper Family Holiday

A Proper Family Holiday by Chrissie Manby

Could you survive a week-long holiday with your entire family? Newly single magazine journalist Chelsea Benson can’t think of anything worse.
Your grubby small nephew torpedoing any chance of romance with the dishy guy you met on the plane . . .
Your eighty-five-year-old granddad chatting up ladies at the hotel bar . . .
Getting nothing but sarcastic comments from your older sister, who’s always been the family favourite . . .
And all this is before your parents drop their bombshell.
Is a week enough time for the Bensons to put their differences aside and have some fun? Or is this their last ever proper family holiday?

Buy now

Amy Snow

Amy Snow by Tracy Rees

Unlock the secret with the Richard and Judy bestseller. ‘My favourite novel of last year’ Lucinda Riley. Perfect for fans of The Seven Sisters, The Lake House and Dinah Jefferies’ The Tea Planter’s Wife.

Buy now

Don't You Forget About Me

Don’t You Forget About Me by Alexandra Potter

From the bestselling author of Me and Mr Darcy, this funny, magical love story is for every girl who has loved, lost and dreamt of getting her man back.

Buy now

Turning Forty

Turning Forty by Mike Gayle

How to turn forty:
1. Set yourself a personal challenge.
2. Clear wardrobe of all age inappropriate clothing.
3. Relax.

How not to turn forty:
1. Have a complete meltdown . . .

‘Wise, witty and wonderful . . . a triumph!’ Jenny Colgan

Buy now

Lavender House

The Lavender House by Hilary Boyd

Emotional, page-turning women’s fiction from the author of #1 ebook bestseller, Thursdays in the Park. Will Nancy dare to risk a second chance at love with a man her family and friends tell her is totally unsuitable? Beautiful storytelling for fans of Erica James, Veronica Henry and Harriet Evans.

Buy now

 

 

Win a Valentine's Day Book Bundle

Win a Valentine's Day Book Bundle

Happy Valentine’s Day you lovely lot!

We’ve got the perfect gift for you today, and no it’s not a dozen red roses or a teddy bear that says ‘I Wuv You’, it’s something that you really want…A BIG BUNDLE OF BOOKS!

Don’t we know you well?

We’ve got nine fantastic books from nine of our fantastic authors who featured in our recent Valentine’s themed blog posts, and all you have to do to be in with a chance of winning this ultimate Valentine’s Book Bundle is email your name and address to bookends@hachette.co.uk with the subject line ‘Valentine’s Book Bundle’, it’s really that simple. Full Ts&Cs here

The competition ends at 10am on Friday 19th Feb, and the winner will be announced on the Bookends Twitter and Facebook page by midday on Friday – Good Luck!

If you aren’t already sick of the lovey-dovey stuff, you can catch up on our authors sharing their most romantic moments here (part 1) and here (part 2) 

Or if you’re sick and tired of hearts and flowers, check out some of our authors worst date stories here (part 1) and here (part 2) – see, bad dates happen to the best of us! 

Our authors share their most romantic moments ever (part 2)

Our authors share their most romantic moments ever (part 2)

Our authors are a lucky bunch! Catch up on part 1 of their most romantic moments here. 

TAMARA MCKINLEY, author of Echoes from Afar

The most romantic gesture I’ve had was from my husband.   We’d been engaged as teenagers and drifted apart, only to meet and fall in love again thirty-five years later.   He always knew I wanted to go home for a visit to Australia, so he bought tickets for us to fly there for my birthday and to visit family and friends.   I’d been away for many years and I cried when we touched down in Sydney and he whispered, ‘Welcome home,’ but the most magical moment was when we walked on the beach that had been my childhood favourite, and he presented me with a childhood favourite, a Violet chocolate bar – similar to a Crunchie, but with dark chocolate.   Needless to say, I shared it with him and then stole chocolaty kisses as we watched the sun go down and listened to the parakeets return to their roosts.

Read all about how Tamara was inspired by her favourite city here 

CHRISTINA HOPKINSON, author of The Weekend Wives 

The most romantic, chick flick thing ever to happen to me was during my end of first-year exams at university. I studied at the sort of place where you have to wear traditional gowns to do exams in an ancient hall, which only adds to the cinematic flavour of this story. As I was midway through my last exam, a tall rather dashing looking man strode up to the front desk to pick up some more paper. As he did so, he casually threw a note onto my desk which read: ‘Will you come to the Trinity Ball with me tonight?’. I went bright red and spent the rest of the paper distracted, especially since I couldn’t go with him because I was, Cinderella style, actually working at the ball.

I feel like that story should end with the words, ‘and that’s how your father and I met’. Instead, we had an awkward conversation after the exam and I was later aggrieved to find I had flunked that paper and he’d got himself a first!

ALEX POTTER, author of Love From Paris 

It was a freezing day in December and I was travelling home on the bus, laden down with supermarket shopping bags. It had been a long day and I was tired and suffering from a stinking cold. Traffic was bad so I texted my husband to tell him I was running late. Finally, as the bus pulled up at my stop, I wearily got up from my seat. It was already dark and as the automatic doors opened, I braced myself for the ten-minute walk home. Then I saw him, sitting at the bus stop waiting for me with a large, steaming Hot Toddy he’d just made and the biggest smile, my husband. As I stepped off the bus he handed me the flask of hot whiskey and honey, grabbed my bags and walked me home, his big strong arm around my waist. Now that’s what I call romance.

Read about Alex’s 7 favourite books set in Paris here 

CHRISSIE MANBY, author of A Proper Family Adventure 

It’s not your traditional hearts and flowers that touch my heart. A cup of tea in the morning is the way to make me smile.

If you liked this post, then catch why not catch up on…

Authors reveal their worst Valentine’s date stories (part 1)

Authors reveal their worst Valentine’s date stories (part 2) 

 

Our authors share their most romantic moments ever (part 1)

Our authors share their most romantic moments ever (part 1)

TRACY REES, author of Amy Snow and Florence Grace 

I’m going to start with the second most romantic gesture I’ve ever received (because I’m like that!) I once received from a boyfriend, for my birthday, a beautiful, specially commissioned pen and ink drawing. It was beautifully framed and the artwork was exquisite but that was not the most special thing. The most special thing was that the drawing was of all the main characters from a story I’d written, a story I still absolutely love and so want to have published one day. The amazing thing was that the boyfriend in question had never read the story, yet the figures and the atmosphere in the picture were spot-on. He said he’d just listened when I talked about it! Either he was a REALLY good listener or I just talk too much. Anyway, that was a very thoughtful, romantic gesture. Which brings me on to the MOST romantic gesture… Well, I haven’t received it yet of course! But I’m looking forward to it.

Read Tracy’s quick-fire Q&A here

ADELE PARKS, author of If You Go Away 

I’ve tried very hard to think about the one big romantic gesture that swept me off my feet and left me breathless, but I can’t. It’s not that my husband is unromantic – far from it – but I’ve realized his gestures to show his love for me tend to be small and endless, rather than grand and spasmodic. His actions are not gestures, their meaningful actions designed to make me as happy as possible as constantly as possible. Our days are full of texting, laughing, teasing, listening. He’ll light candles, run baths and buy me flowers when it’s not my birthday but maybe just a bad day.

Read how Adele is changing the face of love with four special short story collections here 

ROSANNA LEY, author of The Saffron Trail 

I woke up one Valentine’s morning to find my bedroom strewn with pink paper hearts. They were everywhere; heart-garlands hanging from the walls, hearts poking out from behind the wardrobe, hearts inside the chest of drawers, even hearts under my pillow. On the bed was a small cassette. My boyfriend had gone to work. I listened to the cassette with trepidation. What might it be? A love poem recited? An invitation to a swanky restaurant? A proposal?

It was one of my favourite songs: ‘My Girl’ sung and recorded by my boyfriend. He had a great voice and he had gone to SO much trouble. I would love to tell you that we got married the following year and lived happily ever after. But sadly, romantic gestures cannot stand alone and we split up two weeks later… I still smile though when I hear that song. Right romantic gesture, wrong man. What can I say..?

Read a free extract from The Saffron Trail here 

CLÉLIE AVIT, author of I’m Still Here 

Just some weeks ago, my soon-to-be husband, getting on one knee and promising me to marry me this summer in the mountains because he knows I have always dreamt of it.

MARINA FIORATO, author of The Double Life of Mistress Kit Kavanagh  

I’ve always dreamed about going on the Orient Express – there’s just something so romantic about train travel, and the Orient Express is the ultimate train, a rolling work of art.

On the morning of Valentine’s Day 2014 my husband (film director Sacha Bennett) found babysitters for our children and told me to put on something glamorous. He whisked me off to Victoria Station, where we were conducted (by liveried guards!) to board the world’s most famous train.

We couldn’t quite make it to Venice or Istanbul on that occasion, as we both had work commitments not to mention two school-age kids, but we had a lovely morning pootling around the picturesque counties in the south of England. We had a private compartment complete with art deco marquetry and Lalique sconces, and the service was amazing. Our own steward served us an eight course brunch and as much Buck’s Fizz as we could drink (which was a LOT).

It was so lovely of my husband to surprise me in this way, but I had a surprise of my own up my sleeve – the first proof of my novel Beatrice and Benedick had arrived that morning, and I gave it to him over brunch. He started to leaf through it and saw the dedication – ‘To Sacha, who is my Benedick’. I’m not ashamed to say that we both cried!

If you liked this post, then why not catch up on…

Authors share their worst Valentine’s dates (part 1)

Authors share their worst Valentine’s dates (part 2)

Authors share their worst Valentine's dates, Part 1

Authors share their worst Valentine's dates, Part 1

Terrible dates happen to the best of us. Even on Valentine’s Day. Even to authors. So we invited our authors to share their Valentine’s Day horror stories…

 

Cate Woods, author of Just Haven’t Met You

My worst Valentines date was the one I spent with a D-List celebrity (female) famous for her passion for footballers and low-cut tops.

At the time I was a writer on a weekly magazine, and my editor thought it would make a funny feature for me to spend Valentine’s evening with this woman – let’s call her Abi – so she could show pathetic, boyfriend-less me her best pulling tips. So off we went, accompanied by a photographer and his assistant, on a bar crawl around London.

Of course, as it was Valentine’s night, everywhere was packed with loved-up couples, so the problem was trying to find any single men for Abi to teach me to seduce. We trooped from bar to bar, a trail of furious wives and girlfriends in our wake. And when we did finally locate some single blokes they didn’t give me a second look; why would they, with Abi wearing a top that barely covered her, um, ‘pulling tips’?

We ended up having to stage the pictures, with me pretending to chat up the photographer’s assistant. I think Abi actually went home with him in the end. I can’t be sure, as I was busy paying the bill for all the champagne she’d ordered.

 

Alex Potter, author of Love From Paris

I was living in Los Angeles and dating a guy who, for the reasons of anonymity, I’m going to call Ethan. For a Valentine’s Day treat he’d arranged massages for us at a fancy spa, with dinner afterwards. I was thrilled. Well, who doesn’t love a massage? What I didn’t know, until I walked into the dimly-lit massage room and spotted two tables and a butt-naked Ethan, was that he’d booked a couples massage. Romantic? Er, I think not. I’m no prude but we’d only been on two dates. I’ve never been so embarrassed; I tried to maneuver myself onto the massage table without flashing him my wobbly bits. Worse was he promptly fell asleep and his loud snores drowned out the pan-pipe music. Suffice to say, there was never a fourth date.

 

Harriet Evans, author of A Place For Us

I could write an entire book about terrible dates I have had. I never understand why people are squeamish about internet dating or try to pretend they’ve never done it. I loved it, and I loved the idea that it’s a rainy boring Tuesday in November and you’re in a pair of high-heeled boots off to meet a stranger for a glass of wine and who knows where it might lead (in my case almost always to too much wine and a snog). I wasn’t single in the Tinder era so I think maybe it was a more innocent age, but I loved my internet dates.

But my worst date was a bloke I met in a club on a hen night. I was doing internet dating and wasn’t really expecting to pull anyone in real life that night. He was a barman at Browns on St Martin’s Lane and I snogged him and then we went out for a drink the following week. I a) drank way too much b) was impressed when he took me to the (now vanished) All Bar One in Covent Garden and got us a free bottle of wine because he knew the barman there. ‘It’s the code of barpeople, we look after each other’. HE ACTUALLY SAID THIS. I then snogged him for absolutely ages in an alleyway – what else are you going to do on a date with someone who talks rubbish? In a pause for breath he then told me he had hired a helicopter to take his ex girlfriend – with whom he was madly in love and trying to win back, he informed me with puppyish excitement – to the Eden Project in Cornwall the following week followed by dinner at Rick Stein’s afterwards.

The worst bit was that I didn’t really like him that much either (‘the code of barpeople’) but the idea that he was either playing me for a complete fool or found me so totally repulsive he had to lie about a helicopter trip and an ex girlfirend was very, very depressing and brought on a massive existential crisis such as the single amongst you will recognise which lasted into the next morning. Until I went into work and told my friends about it and they all fell about laughing and I realised the whole thing was actually, pretty hilarious. So the worst date ever can always make for a good story.

 

Liked this? Why not catch up on…

… Joanna Bolouri on the three stages of being single